A Long…Pause


Welcome back, I say to myself.  And to you…if you are out there:)  It   has been a long time since I’ve visited this animal –  but I am glad to be here today, with you, and with the page.

I was about to dump this site after such a long hiatus, and when I sat down to do so, I had a change of heart.  All these beautiful words – I can’t just throw them away.  And so here I sit, typing away, not knowing what to write for this new “first” post…because, indeed – it does feel like I am starting all over again.  But I view that as a gift, because starting over means we have already been around…something, so we have experience, we have knowledge, we have…history.

The photograph above is another example of not visiting for a long while.  This is my childhood home, yard, pond – in Oakdale, MN – a place that holds so many beautiful, powerful, formative memories I can hardly breathe, for the emotions this brings up in me.  I had not visited my childhood home since my parents had to sell in the late 80’s, early 90’s.  It was heart-breaking then, but I was a young young woman, looking forward to my future…my eyes were not on the past.

And now, having children of my own – and building a life, together, with them, here in this house, on this street, in this crazy beautiful state that we live in – it brings me to a place that feels…liminal.  As though I stand, now, in a place of in-between.  Not young.  Not old.    But weaving in this shifting landscape.  And that’s good, that’s okay – because it’s certainly better than the alternative! Right:)

So – welcome back to ekholab…my excursion into what it means to be an artist, a writer, an explorer of the human soul.  I’m so happy to share this journey with you…and to have you share this, with me.